Nursing is going really well for us, in that I've been able to nurse Frankie since he was born and he's gaining weight well and that is his only source of nutrition, but MAN is it painful. It is incredible to me that the human species has survived thus far predicated on the notion that babies will survive their early months via just breastfeeding. No wonder wet nurses used to be so popular!! I'm holding out hope that it will magically stop hurting after a month, or six weeks, as so many more experienced moms have told me.
One thing comes to my mind every time he nurses. I've been trying to offer up the pain of each latch-on for some special intention (got an intention? Let me know!). Each time I think of Our Lord's words: "Take and eat. This is my body, given up for you." Those words take on a whole new meeting when you are a nursing mom! It hurts so much, but I'm grateful to be able to offer that gift to my baby. And I think this experience has helped me understand better what Christ meant with those words. Now every time we go to Mass, I tear up during the Consecration; there is just so much more meaning there.
If this all sounds like crazy ramblings to you... chalk it up to my sleep deprivation and overlook it, wouldya? Thanks.
:)
Nursing is tough! My daughter (now 2) was having a tough time getting a proper latch at the beginning, so a well-meaning nurse gave me a nipple shield at the hospital. It helped so much, but I was an emotional wreck about it. The lactation consultants, my sisters and my mom were all "Don't let this become a thing!" and I kept trying to break her of the habit, but she would have such struggles and then I'd be really sore and bloody. It was a mess! Long story short, I never stopped using the shield. It bothered me for the first several months and then I finally just accepted the fact that this was helping us and it made nursing work. She nursed for a year and then weaned herself and that was that. Now that I'm expecting my second in 6 weeks, I'm praying that he'll have a better latch and we'll be able to do it without the shield, but I also know that if it's too hard and we need the help, it's no big deal. I'll definitely keep in mind your apt correlation between Our Lord's words on the Eucharist and the tough road of breastfeeding!
ReplyDeleteI feel like it shouldn't be this painful for you. Please do try another LC or talk to the midwife. It may be a problem with his latch or you having too much milk.(With one of mine it was overproduction - and pumping a tiny bit made it more bearable) Also, I liked to pump once a day and give a bottle or have Daddy do it for a golden few hours of being me and not just the milk source! (As precious and wonderful as it is . . . there are moments it just is too much.) Don't burn yourself out. Prayers for you and your beautiful little one.
ReplyDeleteDitto Saiorse. Try to get someone (a nurse, LC, or even just an experienced mom friend) to take a look at how he's latching. They can also help you get used to some different holds or positions to see if that helps your comfort level. This is a beautiful reflection on redemptive suffering and our ability as mothers to enter into Christ's sacrifice in a unique way, but pain is so often your body's way of telling you something is wrong. Just because you're able to spiritually benefit from it doesn't mean you should give up on fixing a potential problem.
ReplyDelete♥ I'll be filing this away in my heart for a future date. ♥
ReplyDeleteYes to the comments so far: it does hurt for a few weeks for some women, but it's so hard to know whether you are just one of those women or there's actually some issue. Please don't hesitate to ask another LC or friend; it is very easy to miss something like a tongue tie (or a lip tie! Does he have a frenulum on either the lower or upper lip? Sometimes a lip tie means that the baby doesn't have trouble getting enough to eat, but the mother hurts like crazy). Sometimes a tongue tie won't be visible at a glance or from the wrong vantage point, but it can be seen if you push back under the tongue with your fingers (which can show a posterior tongue tie) or if you check from a different direction. Tongue ties are so easily resolved -- your pediatrician can actually just snip it with scissors (the nerves have not yet developed there in young infants, so it isn't painful for them).
ReplyDeleteTake heart in that even if there is something "wrong" and you can't figure it out, these things do tend to improve as the baby's mouth gets bigger and more adept!
In the meantime...nursing candy? You get a piece of chocolate every time he latches on :)
Dear Tess,
ReplyDeleteI really love reading about your new little boy - a huge congratulations :)
Seeing as you are asking for intentions - could you please pray for my family, especially for our farm and its future?
Thank you and God bless you and the Franks!
Intentions? I could use some prayers! Could you pray for wisdom and guidance for a particularly...interesting...situation I've got right now?
ReplyDeleteYes! Although I agree with everyone else's comments that perhaps it should not be as painful as what you've experienced thus far. The only time I remember feeling it was THAT bad was actually when Gabriel began teething (how hard he was latching and chomping actually helped me realize he had gum pain). I will say some prayers in the hopes it eases up for you!
ReplyDeleteI had the same thought about "this is my body, given up for you" nothing like becoming a parent to help you better understand God's boundless love for us!
ReplyDeleteDear Tess,
ReplyDeleteI'm enjoying your wonderful, brave posts about new motherhood, and am moved to write in sympathy for your nursing pain. Here is another free resource www.llli.org - La Leche League - I hope the information is helpful and not overwhelming. LLLI is made up of mothers with tremendous experience and great compassion.
My understand, after nursing two babies, (now your age) is that the process should not be painful after a couple or three weeks, once one's nipples have toughened up, but there are many exceptions that deserve attention so that nursing becomes effortless and delightful.
Prayers for your continuing success and ability to see this through. Your Frankie is adorable, your pictures and posts evidence of your and your husband's impressive faith, hope and love.
A very belated congratulations on your beautiful, healthy baby boy, Tess! He's so precious. :) And I loved what you said about breastfeeding completely changing your view of Communion...such a lovely thought. I hope the process (of breastfeeding) becomes less painful, though! I've known a few moms that also struggled with it, and in some cases, just didn't have success with it period. Praying for things to go smoother though!
ReplyDeleteTess, do you have a lactation consultant available? It's been many moons (more than 7 years, sniff) since I had a nursling, but I had a great lactation nurse in the hospital who I could call on and visit the breastfeeding resource center. It's in a different location now, but here was my local one: http://www.osfsaintfrancis.org/services/WomensServices/breastfeeding-resource-center.html . My consultant gave me something I wore inside my nursing bras (beneath the nursing pads) for many months. It was like a soft membrane, and so helped healing and made it more comfortable between nursings. I'm sure there are many more new technologies out there that are even better, but these places are really worth looking into. I'm sure you could contact this one for a rec. of one in your area. Best wishes to you, and keep enjoying your baby. Nursing does get better, I promise.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry nursing has been painful for you, Tess. The pain lasted about 2 weeks while I was first nursing Matthew but with Emma it lasted for almost 3 1/2 months. It was such an ordeal and I would dread that latch on. I mainly had trouble on one side because she kept latching incorrectly (due to being tongue-tied!) and she ended up giving me a pretty nasty crack that took forever to heal and left a pretty decent scar. But it is so worth it and it will get better! You are doing a beautiful thing for your baby by sacrificing through this pain for him - and by offering it up too! I used to joke to Paul that many, MANY souls were free from purgatory after my struggles with Emma! I'll be praying for you, Tess. You're a wonderful mother!
ReplyDeleteoh no, so sorry nursing is painful. Can you ask your midwife or access a lactation consultant of some sort - la leche league perhaps - to check the latch for you? What exactly is hurting - is it just the initial latch, and the let down? Because both these do get easier eventually. If it's more/longer than these, you might need a bit of extra expertise xx
ReplyDeleteHi Tess, thanks for using your pain for the intention of others. My husband is looking for a job in Calgary. Please pray he finds one soon. Thank you :)
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