Wednesday, November 27, 2013
Six great, big months
This blog is sort of turning into a once-a-week-on-Wednesdays thing... most definitely not intentional. I promise. There are so many posts I have cooking up and it's just a matter of finding time to share them. Always a work in progress!
Anyway, this week Frank and I celebrated six months of marriage.
Well, actually, we almost forgot what day it was. I came home from work and walked into the bedroom where Frank was taking off his tie.
"Honey!" I declared."Guess what day it is!"
Frank stood there with the slightly terrified look of a man who is suddenly afraid he has missed his wife's birthday. I could tell he was doing frantic calculations in his head.
Finally his face relaxed into a big grin. "It's our six month anniversary!" he declared with relief.
"Yes!" I said, and we gave each other a big hug. Then we got in the car to go to the dry cleaner's because they close at 7:00 and Frank needed to pick up his suit. Technically speaking there was no need for me to come along, but Frank asked me to so we could spend the time together.
In the car, after I was done making all the requisite jokes about being an old married couple, I asked him what he had learned from the past six months.
I adore these kind of conversations—these "State of the Union" talks, or "Navigators' Councils." I love getting all introspective about how marriage has changed us, and what we can work on in our relationship. I think it comes from too much reading of A Severe Mercy. Frank is less a fan, but he endures them patiently.
Frank said he had learned a lot about me, but that marriage is about what he expected it to be.
I, on the other hand, think that marriage has brought a few surprises. I tried to articulate the biggest lesson I've learned so far.
In My Big Fat Greek Wedding (one of our favorite movies), there's a sweet and funny moment when the mom says, "The man is the head of the house, but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants."
What I'm coming to think is that, more accurately, the woman is the heart of the family. I never realized until I was married just how much ... power a wife has to affect the mood and the happiness of her family. It's like what Sarah says about the energy of a home. Frank looks to me to keep us both on track emotionally. He relies on me to maintain a calm and peaceful energy. It's hard to explain, exactly, but I'm hoping some of you wives out there know what I mean.
Anyway, as I expounded my deep theories about marriage, Frank said he was totally in the mood for burgers.
"Ok," I said, "Let's take the long way home through La Grange and see if we pass any good burger places on our way."
Luck was on our side. We found a place called Smashburger and enjoyed a tasty anniversary dinner of burgers and fries. Then we went home and watched a movie.
I have to say, it's been a pretty great six months.