Monday, April 28, 2014

I think I might be losing my mind.

Guess what.

You won't believe it.

I'm still pregnant.


Do you think it's possible to get depressed from waiting for a baby to come? Ever since we passed my due date, I've been a mix of impatient, frustrated and upset. And by "upset" I mean "bursting into tears at the dinner table in front of my entire family." This waiting game is so much harder than I ever anticipated.

We've tried all the things—I mean seriously, ALL the things. Pineapple, labor cookies, raspberry leaf tea, evening primrose oil, walking, jumping jacks, acupressure... I'm probably forgetting some. If a slightly dubious internet source recommends it as a way of inducing labor, odds are good I've given it a shot.

The thing is, I KNEW I was going to go late. My mom had my little brother 10 days past his due date, and almost all of my other siblings at least a week past. I know that first pregnancies tend to go a week late, on average. But now that I'm actually here, with Baby's clothes all nicely washed and put away and the hospital bags packed and the car seat installed and checked and double-checked... I just want this sweet child to COME OUT ALREADY. It drives me crazy that I can't just FORCE my body to do what I want it to.

I don't think I've ever used this many caps in a blog post, ever.

Today is the feast of St. Gianna, who I've always loved, and who is a patron saint of mothers and unborn children. I'm asking begging her intercession that I go into labor today.

Hopefully my next post will contain a happy announcement. But in the meantime, I've convinced myself that my body is actually incapable of going into labor and this baby is NEVER going to come out. So if anyone wants to talk me down from that particular ledge of insanity... I am sure Frank would appreciate not having to deal with it again.


  1. That's so tough! Your wee babe will be here before you know it! Get lots of extra sleep in the meantime! ;)

  2. Sending good vibes your way!
    Hoping Saint Gianna intercedes.


  3. A prayer for you that all goes well!
    St. Gianna, pray for Tess!

  4. One of my friends went almost two weeks overdue, and in her own words, "I went 10 days overdue. I was induced on Sunday, and worked a 50 hr week prior, as I usually did (my job was very physically demanding too). I also hiked 3 miles every day that week before I was induced, ate Thai food (no pineapple though!)... some kids just don't want to be born! Lol"

    I refrained from telling you that before because I didn't want you to get depressed...but now that you're at that point, I can just say you're not alone, and if my work schedule was at all more conducive, I would drive up and give you a big hug and make you a lasagna or something. Praying for you, dear heart! My mom is usually really phlegmatic but full-term pregnancy always made her unexplainably weepy. You can do it! It's very very crazy but it's because you're on the huge threshold of bringing a human being into the world, which is enormous and scary but also wonderful and beautiful. I know patience isn't one of my strong suits and other people are always telling me to calm down and draw a bubble bath or something, If I was in your shoes I'm sure I would be insane by now.

    BUT...it's going to be okay. I asked my young adult group at church to pray for you 'cause I was sure you'd be going bonkers. Remember that passage in John? "Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice; you will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will turn into joy. When a woman is in travail she has sorrow, because her hour has come; but when she is delivered of the child, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a child is born into the world. So you have sorrow now, but I will see you again and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you." I usually take that passage metaphorically but it applies to you so literally right now! No one will take your joy from you.

  5. But hey, if it does refuse to come out, at least in 18 years you'll get to go back to Notre Dame.

  6. Praying for you Tess! After my first (who was two days early) all my babies have been anywhere from a week to two weeks late! It is awful, I know!!!! But you will make it! It will happen, and all will be well! May God bless you and give you peace and strength!


  7. I am praying for you and for labour to come sooner rather than later! 3 out of 5 of us siblings, including me, were late - the last one by 10 days; he only decided to make an appearance the day before my mum would have been induced! The way my mum used to spin it might help you through the final stretch - she used to say that if we were late, it was only because we were so happy and cosy in the womb! So I guess it's a sign that you've done a fantastic job providing baby with a cosy, safe and comfy home for the last 9 months - you did such a good job (s)he doesn't want to leave! Go you! Still, I can't imagine how frustrating it must be to still be waiting - so I'll keep sending up those prayers. Take care and fingers crossed there's not long to go now xxx

    1. correction - I have actually checked this with my mama who says that in fact I (the eldest) was the only one who was late (setting a standard for the rest of my life...) - so not sure where I got the idea 3 of us were. BUT on the plus side, my mum says it is quite common for 1st babies to be overdue - they are just too cosy!

  8. Oh, Tess! This must be killing you (obviously - sorry to beat a dead horse). I can't imagine. You sound SO READY! It's easy to offer words of wisdom when you're not the one that's 40+ weeks pregnant - but just try to remember that your baby will come in his/her own way in God's timing. His timing is perfect, even if we cannot see it (and it drives us CRAZY) while we wait. I'll certainly pray for you!!! And I'll offer up special thanks that you are healthy, your baby is healthy, and you've been blessed with some bonus time to just be married and love your man (because being a mom is sooooo fun and such a blessing but you will never ever again JUST be married and have alone time together like this not as parents). Make Frank take you on a romantic date to pass the time! :D Seriously. Do something fun you two won't be able to do for awhile once your precious little baby is in your arms. <3

  9. I can totally relate, Tess. The majority of the pregnancy seems to just fly by until the last few days/weeks before the baby comes. Emma was 2 1/2 weeks past her due date and I was so frustrated. Since this is your first pregnancy, it can sometimes take a bit longer for labor to kick in. But it will happen and soon you will be holding the second love of your life! You are in our prayers!!

  10. Now is probably not the time to tell you my poor mom had to wait 3.5 weeks for me (her first) to arrive, huh? ;) praying for you 3 and a safe delivery - can't wait for the news!!

  11. These last few days are always the hardest, you'll be holding your precious wee one soon. With our last baby I went over two weeks past my due date which felt like a year! Labor was very easy though, so if the waiting made that part better I think I'd be willing to go through the waiting part again.

    Praying for a quick easy delivery for you, and hopefully soon!


  12. GAH! I am sorry, Tess. For what it's worth, you look really gorgeous in this picture! I love the yellow!!!

  13. Praying! I can only imagine your frustration. Lots of hugs!

  14. Ahh I know the feeling! My second was almost a month late and the other two were very late, too. I found that no amount of "trying" did anything!

  15. Oh man... if the anticipation is killing me, I can only imagine what you feel like!!

  16. Hang in there, Tess! Having just been there myself very very recently I know exactly how you feel! I tried everything home remedy/old wives' tale imaginable to make him come. Even medical induction didn't work the first time around. I'm not sure it even worked the second time, I think I'd just finally surrendered and relaxed enough to let my body let him come. I had so many pent-up (even some that had been subconscious until I started digging into myself). I had to let them all go first. I know it sounds impossible, but relax! I'll be praying for you!

  17. Oh, Tess, I hate this waiting for you. What a whirlwind it is when the baby comes, but those days before are SO SLOW. My mom's first was two weeks late and whenever she talks about it she looks off into the distance and says: "I just raked leaves. For two whole weeks. There were so many leaves." So you're not alone in feeling like you're losing your mind.

    Jenny of Mama Needs Coffee swears by pedicures...which are certainly more fun than castor oil...

    Praying praying praying.

  18. Hello Tess

    I have never been pregnant, or expecting babies anytime soon at all, but I have heard driving (gently) over speed bumps or eating curry can work.

    Hope baby decides the oven is too warm and hurries up outta there.