Thursday, June 19, 2014

Stuff my little sister says

So, you guys may remember that time when I asked you to say hi to my little brother, who started reading my blog a few months ago.

Well, it turns out that he's not the only one who would like to say hello to you all. My ten-year-old sister started reading my blog too... and she has quite a lot to say. I started writing down some of her funny comments lately, and thought you might enjoy them.

(By the way—my dad asked me not to use my little siblings' real names on the blog, so I let my sister choose a pseudonym and she picked "Lizzie." I'll be referring to her by that name.)

Stuff "Lizzie" Says

Lizzie: You know what you should do right now?
Me: What?
L: You should write about me on your blog. Because one time you wrote about [our brother] and everyone said hi to him, and I was like, "I exist too you know!!!"

L: Sometimes it's really useful to have older siblings.
Me (smiling in proud anticipation of what she might say about my sisterly awesomeness): Oh yeah? 
L: Yeah, last week my teacher asked if anyone could spell "college." Everyone in the whole class got it wrong except me!

While making mac and cheese:
L: You know what we need right now?
Me: Hm?
L: We need some music!

She put on music and the song Whiskey for my men, Beer for my horses came on:
Me (not really thinking): Oh, I love this song.
L: I know right??
Me: slightly shocked
L: I have this song twice on my iPod!
Proceeds to belt out the chorus 

After I told Lizzie I was writing down stuff she said, we sat down to lunch and Lillian asked her to go get us some napkins. She didn't want to, so Lillian said, "How about if one of your quotes is 'I will helpfully go fetch the napkins?'" Lizzie took that and ran with it. For the rest of the weekend, all we heard was this:
"I will helpfully go fetch the napkins."
"I will helpfully go fetch you a knife."
"I will helpfully go fetch a glass of water."
"I will helpfully change the baby's diaper," etc.
Finally Lillian and I felt so guilty we stopped asking her to do stuff, which was her plan all along. Clever kid!

Lizzie is obsessed with proving that she can be a good babysitter by changing all the diapers. All weekend, we heard this: 
Why didn't you tell me you were changing his diaper??
And this:
Someday I'll graduate to changing diapers without supervision!!
And this:
I can come live with you and change his diapers all the time!

That kid is too much. Love you, little Liz!